good grief

a girl walks into a cute charming vintage store. There's a darling little black & white checkered skirt hanging on the stores' 3 foot long rod of bonafide one-of-a-kind vintage clothing that catches her eye immediately.  She grabs it before anyone else can and heads to the fitting room and excitedly goes to put it on.  It doesn't go over her hips. {wwwwwhhhhhhyyyy!??}  Her head hangs low as she puts it back on the hangar, and hangs that adorable little skirt back on the rack.  She curses those damn hips of hers and does a mental one-two-three punch at herself for not sticking to that "clean eating" and workout program she's been avoiding for 389 days.  She wanders around the shop for another 15 minutes, unable to let herself leave cause that skirt is taunting her, it is soooo cute. I mean, she could wear it to work, and everything. And it's the only one.  It won't be found again, anywhere.  A gravity force pulls her back to the little rack, and off comes the skirt again, and back to the dressing room she goes.  I mean, maybe if she tugged and pulled it would claw itself over those hips.  Maybe she just didn't pull hard enough the first time.  Nope.  There is just not enough fabric to make it over those mountains below her waist.  She takes it off, hangs it on the wall hangar in the dressing room stall and stares.  Well, it'd probably only take 3 inches or so.. so say, 30 maybe 45 days of good clean eating and hip shaving exercise?   Yes!  That's all it would take.  So she got the damn skirt!!!!  And it hung in her closet, untouched, for 285 days.  (Yes, I counted, it was 285 days).  But, FINALLY, she hit the fit trip, 42 days passed, and she reached for that little skirt, and with a big breath to suck it all in, she slipped her toes into it, reached down, pulled it up... and it fit!!!!!!!!!!  And then she wondered if it was really as cute as she thought it was.  ;P

Good grief, does this ever happen to anyone else, or is it just me????