i keep chickening on polka

blazer: material girl ~ Macy's
skirt ~ H&M
shoes ~ Charlotte Russe

if only I had followed Yi-chia's lead and worn polka dots like she did here with this skirt here.  I really meant to, I tried it.  But I chickened.  The whole pattern mixing thing feels scary to me!  Now I look at how I wore it and it feels matronly.  Kind of how I'm feeling tonight.  Matronly.  Mom duties and responsibilities abound.  Good news?  My bestie is coming to town and we're hitting a blow bar.  I can't wait to do get my hair did and just chill and have some girl time.  Polka dots.  Shoulda worn polka dots and boots with that skirt. Next time!

wishing a very happy happy birthday to my beautiful mother today.  Love you momma!  

i die, i die, i die

via

I came across this, and i died.
i really almost died.

could I?  dare I? should I?
will I?  I might.
would You?

-m-

baby, i was born this way

Word Board

Style Board

sometimes I really really obsessively love pinning.  okay, let's get real.  I always really really love it.  I just don't always do it.  But lately I've been sneaking on, 5 minutes here, 5 minutes there.  And sometimes I just love looking at my boards at the things I loved.  Like these.  Sorry the direct links aren't available, it's been a rushed 24 hours, but all of these can be found on my pinterest boards, links are above.

have a fab Wednesday!!

we're half way over the Hump!

-m-

ps..  click the pin to find me on pinterest!

fifty shades of stooopid v 2

... and so I give you the ending of last week's first 50 Shades of Stoopid, or Shame, or both.  Cause it was def both for me.. {click here for part 1 if you missed it}..

I was quite literally a hot mess after the fiasco of being stuck in the dang prom dress.. when I finally managed to get the thing off my body, all I wanted to do was get my work pants back on my body and get the heck out of there.  My wedges were already on, so I grabbed my pants and bent over to thrust my foot into the leg and my ankle buckled under me.  and I swear-to-god ~  See Goofy up there?  See the leg action of both legs flying up in the air and the one wrist coming down to break the fall?  That was me.  Except it was my left wrist that came down first.  And then my butt hit.  And then my body. And I watched it all happen in the mirror in front of me.  And it was a THUD.  I laid there, mortified, my wrist screaming, and for the second time in 10 minutes thanked Jesus that no one else was in the dressing room.

Ever fallen like that?  I didn't earn my family's nickname of "Grace" for no reason.. I've fallen a lot over the years, but this one?  This one took the cake.  Thank god I was the only one there to witness it.

-m-

the funny thing of it is ~ 50 Shades of Stupid

it was just like Grey's Anatomy

the sound of the drill filled the background and a bright light beamed down as the man in blue hovered over me.  i closed my eyes and breathed in and out.  in and out.  rhythmically, and the gas filled me.  i had begged for my pandora and had finally received the buds into my ears.  little did I know that my very favorite station, Foster the People, would take me right there.  right to Grey's Anatomy.  i laid there and floated above it all and knew that this was exactly what it was like to be on Grey's.  it had to be just like it.  minus the part where the drilling was happening to my skull.  the drilling was going on inside my mouth.  and minus the part where Doctor McDreamy was above me, it was just your average of the mill looking doc.  but still.  i was there, on Grey's.  if you don't believe me, click on the link and listen, close your eyes, take some deep breathes, pretend you are breathing in laughing gas, beam the flashlight on your phone onto your closed eyeballs, and cue a drill in the background. see?  told you.  if you're still not convinced, just schedule yourself a root canal. don't forget the Foster the People station...

immediately after my root canal experience, i called 3 people and told them i had been on Grey's.  for reals.  i thought i had.  or thought the moment was just like it, and it was.  poor me.  i was traumatized.  i cried silent tears through half of the procedure, the assistant held my hand and told me i reminded her of her daughter, and the doc told me "you can trust me!  you can trust me.  do you trust me?".  *sigh*  i'm suuuuch a baby.  but i survived.  survived the procedure on friday, survived puking from the pain meds on saturday, and am living through the sporadic waves of tooth pain tonight, sunday.  and hell.  i got to feel like what it must be like to be on Grey's.  worth it? ;) 

-m-

oh my dear, it's friday

Dear Fro Yo, is it me, or is it you?  one of us needs to slam the door in the other's face!!  Dear Fat Pants,  thanks for being there for me today. I hate you.  but I love you. but I HATE you. but thank you.   Dear Messy Challenge, shooot! I thought I had you in the bag, but, after the product from the 'do this week, I washed the hair today. 6 days. was it enough?  and speaking of you..  Dear Hair,  I'm coming for you.  WATCH OUT.  the "how-to" Ombre videos are on heavy rotation.  Dear Sun, I am really, really, really,  really going to miss you this weekend. Dear Babe,  I loove the new mix you made!!  and that new One Republic song.. "I'm feeling better since you know me, I feel again, I was a lonely soul but that's the old me, I'm feeling better since you know me"  I die. and got teary eyed. cause that's how I feel about you.  Dear Friends, have a FABBBB weekend, K!

-m-

wednesday night lights

I. 

Red Robin's Apple Harvest Chicken Salad.  

to DIE for ~ at least once.

getting to chat it up with a girlfriend over lunch ~

a thousand deaths.

just the best. 

thanx Heidi!  XO

II. 

it was a perfect night under the lights for Birdie's 

1st of 3 football games this week.

III.  

snapped while sitting in traffic as I crossed town.  

the sky has been spectacular in Portland lately.

most unfortunately due to wild fires in the State,

but also due to the spectacular weather we've been having. 

IV.  

girls, I tell no lies.  

I did yesterday's 'do on myself, before work, in 15 minutes.  

It is sooo Easy Peeesy! 

Happy Thursday!! 

-m-

easy peesy beautiful up-do

1// Let that hair down!
2// section off the crown

3// create small, tight curls around entire crown,
we used a 1/2 inch curling iron barrel
4// spray to hold

5// readjust pony to side of head, behind ear
6// gently piece out each curl

7// use bobby pins to loosely pin back the curls, just above the side pony
8// it should look like one hot curly mess

9// all curls are loosely pinned and ready to create the side pony!
10// take off pony holder,
pull out a thin piece of hair, and
repony the hair, leaving out the extra thin piece of hair

11 // wrap the piece of hair around the pony holder,
secure with bobby pin,
Repeat as desired down pony,
we created 3 as Karley has very long hair.

pull on hair to create poof between ponies

voila!
an easy peesy romantic updo!

purchase here

I picked up this amazing wedding hairstyles book right after Rhett and I were engaged and have been dying to try out some of the do's.  My beautiful little sissy, Karley, agreed to be my muse.  We'll take turns, some do's will be on me, some on her, but we're hoping to get through the book and discover some new ways to manage our manes!

..and I just realized that we chose the 'do on the cover for our first shot!!  How do you think we did?  Would you try it?

it was truly easy peesy!  I will be trying it on myself this am.

Happy Wednesday!

-m-

50 Shades of Stupid ~ last time I shop the Juniors Department

via

last Friday during a quick Starbucks/lunch break at the mall, I zipped into Macy's and happened to pass by the 75% off rack in the Junior department.  On that rack was a brown, long, flowing, seemingly beautiful Prom dress.  I swooped it up in my arms, along with a few other items, and ran into the dressing room for a quick try-on.

The dress was strapless and had a bandanna bodice, with no zipper.  It certainly wouldn't come up over my hips, so I put my hands over my head and shimmied the dress down onto my body.  It hit my boobs, and I had to pull a bit - okay, maybe a lot - to get the bodice down over the ladies, but I got it pulled down and I looked up at myself in the mirror and it.was.Hideous.  And what the H was I doing trying on a damm prom dress anyway?!  Serious.  I have absolutely no event on the books that would require a prom dress.  Why was I wasting my time!?  Those were my exact thoughts, as I looked at myself and this disgusting dress in the mirror and with disgust, I went to yank that ugliness off my body and  it.  would.  NOT.  come.  off.      

The dress mine as well have been epoxy glued onto my boobs.

I yanked, I pulled, I pushed, I grew frantic, I thanked Jesus I had on decent, full coverage, panties cause I had high doubts I was going to get this thing off of my body solo, and the only way it was coming off was by pulling it off over my head which would require full panty exposure.  I sat down.  I practiced breathing.  I panicked.  I tried again.  And again.  And TEN MINUTES later, the damm thing FINALLY came off!!  I still, to this moment, don't know how.

OHMYLORD.  How embarrassing would that have been!? Would I have traumatized the poor little sales girl and asked her to cut it off of me?  Would I have called work and told them I wouldn't be back and called Rhett and sat in that dressing room and waited till he could come rescue me??  We'll never know.  And it'll NEVER happen again, cause I determined then and there.  NO MORE SHOPPING THE JUNIOR DEPARTMENT.  These 32 year old ta-ta's just can't do it anymore.  And that's all I have to say about that.

EXCEPT.. something did happen, about as equally embarrassing about 15 seconds later {same dressing room}, but this has been enough embarrassment for today.  Maybe I'll share it next week.. ;)

-m-

ps, if you want to read some more funny stories,

check out the "50 Shades of Stupid" series,

hosted by Julie Marie,

my inspiration for today's post! 

he DEFIED me. a Snoop! v 5

sooooooooo, 
THIS is what Tristen's Facebook posts 
would look like, 
if he had a Facebook... 
which he shouldn't, 

cause last time he asked me if he could have one, 
I said No... 

ambiguous jobs at Rob Dyrdek's Fantasy Factory and 

"people you may know" notifications featuring UofO alumni, 

cause FB thinks he graduated from there

{he dated himself born in 1980.  like me}

profile pics throwin' the #1 after the golf tourney win

{he's 11.  he's working on the profile pic perfection}

deep provoking thoughts that provoke deep responses such as: 

"My Swag is like a Skater's Jeans, it's always Tight..."

{ohmygoodlooord.  tweens.  seriously}

and photos of his "dog pimpin ice cold"

{pimpin' ice cold?  what rap song did he get that from?  
prob something his mom listened to back in the day.. slap her!}

It'd been awhile since I "Snooped" but good thing I did!  The Facebook Notification in the inbox induced a high squealed whhhhaaaaat?!! from my throat as my heart sunk to the bottom of the ocean and I knew I was gonna have to pull on those "hard-ass-mom-pants" and come down on the boy for going behind my back and opening a FB account when I told him no.  Turns out he had already set it up, THEN asked me, and then failed to inform me that he had already set it up when I said "No".  Suffice it to say, today is the first day of the all week grounding. No TV, No Internet, No after-school gym, and Bed an hour early. All week. Happy Monday to me.  ;) 

-m-

The Clan v. 2012

it's really hard to decide, 

but I'm pretty sure the last shot is my very favorite one.

-m-